Honey-Nut Chocolate Peanut Butter Bars

 As a server working a 12 hour double, I usually get my satisfaction from a fat stack of cash.  Tips are supposed to balance out my measly wage, but tonight I left with a wimpy wallet.  Such situations encourage some to hit the bottle, but I would rather sneak into the kitchen cabinet for another substance: chocolate.  Salivating for the sweet cocoa taste, I reached for a bag of chocolate chips.  As I clutched my prize, I felt an unsettling squish.  Melted chocolate – of course.  Living in a un-air conditioned house had finally revealed its price.  

 Chocolate cravings were reaching urgent levels; I didn’t have much time.  I gripped and ripped the bag of liquefied chocolate, and squeezed it into a saucepot along with a few spoonfuls of creamy peanut butter.   Heating it at low, I stirred in several handfuls of the off-brand honey-nut cereal.  Once all the cereal was evenly coated, I plopped spoonfuls onto the top of a Tupperware lid covered in tinfoil.  Desperate times call for desperate measures, people.  Then I stuck the Tupperware tray into the freezer and let the bars chill for about 15-20 minutes (I recommend you let them go longer, but I don’t have that kind of self-control when I’m having a chocolate craving attack).  

So the next time the chocolate bug bites, know that you are only three ingredients and 20 minutes away from having a cold, crunchy, chocolaty, peanut butter bliss bar.  *Sigh of relief*, “That was easy”.

Honey-Nut Chocolate Peanut Butter Bars

Ingredients:

1 (12 oz) bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips

4 T peanut butter

About 2-3 cups honey-nut cereal

Instructions:

1.       Mix chocolate chips and peanut butter in saucepan over low heat until melted.

2.       Add in cereal – make sure that all can be covered by chocolate sauce.

3.       Place large spoonfuls on cookie sheet covered in tinfoil/parchment paper/etc., let chill in freezer for about 15-20 minutes. 

4.       Store in bags or Tupperware in fridge/freezer for as long as you can keep them.

Makes about a dozen decent sized bars.

Pickles and Peas

What is the weirdest thing you have ever eaten?  Tonight, I ate pickles and peas for dinner.  Yes, sliced kosher dill pickles and frozen peas.

Lately, the combination of working at the restaurant and moving into a new place for the summer has forced me to take a temporary cooking hiatus.  My vintage Revereware pots and pans have been allocated to large liquor cases I procured for free from the ABC store; and without new groceries for 2 weeks, my fridge has turned into a chilled, barren box.  I was left with the dregs of my food supplies and one accessible pot.  This disorienting situation pushed my creative limits, and is probably what propelled me to reach for the pickles and peas.  I should switch my degree to Thrifty Ingenuity instead of Government – seems more apt for me.  

I love pickles, but I regularly throw the juice down the sink once I am finished eating them.  Saving the juice never seemed worth it - what a waste.  Some people claim that it works miracles on muscle cramps and hangovers, while others believe that it is relegated only to the weird cravings of pregnant women and the drunken dares of peers.  There must be a way to incorporate pickle juice into cooking.  After all, it's just water, vinegar (acetic acid), calcium chloride, salt, and some flavorings like dill and garlic. That’s it? I could work with that.  

Frustrated with my lack of food, I finally settled for frozen peas.   For a pre-dinner snack (if you can call peas ‘dinner’), I retrieved the pickle jar from the fridge.  Crunching on a kosher dill pickle, I wondered how pickles would taste with peas.   Peas are pretty good, pickles are way good, and I already had dill weed in the peas.   Peas and pickle juice, why not.  I hesitantly added the briny liquid to the peas as they were simmering.  The combination created a very green, grassy, and salty taste.  The great thing about peas is that they will pleasantly absorb any flavor they come into contact with. 

Some might think that making a dish with pickles, peas, dill weed, pickle juice, garlic, and unsalted butter sounds desperate.  I found it an amusing and unique side dish.  I would pair it with fish or chicken – some sort of light meat – or perhaps incorporate some navy beans and make it a stew or soup.  I did not use a recipe, or measure anything out.  But here is a rough estimate:

Pickles and Peas

Ingredients:

1 cup peas, frozen

1 T butter, unsalted

¼ cup pickle juice

1 tsp dried dill weed

½ clove garlic, finely diced

4-5 pickles, sliced  

Instructions:

1.       Place everything but the pickles into small saucepan.  Bring to boil, then reduce to a simmer.

2.       Continue to simmer about 5-7 minutes.  (Let most of the liquid simmer off)

3.       Add sliced pickles right before serving. 

Makes about 1 cup.

The Jalapeno, Lime, and CilanTrio: 3 Different Dips Using the Same Three Ingredients

I love a bargain as much as the next guy, but some cheap things must be bought on principle.  Take, for example, an $8 deep fryer we found at a thrift store.  Sure, it’s not going to produce anything overtly healthy (so far we have fried tortillas, pickles, saltines, and beignets – no regrets so far); but at least by the end of exams, your brain won’t be the only thing breaded and fried.  

Our deep fryer was full of possibility, easily outdoing any dorm’s vending machine as the best junk food machine around.  Some were skeptical – “What are you going to do with it?” Better question, what were we NOT going to do with it.  Visions of sugarplum fairies have nothing on beer-battered shrimp, crispy fried chicken, or fried dough.  Soft corn tortillas, the precursor to a perfect dipping vessel, were on sale for about $3 a package of 30, so we picked one up.  When we returned home, and cut each individual tortilla into 4 slices, we realized we had way more than a lot of chips. 

A ritual was born: finish an exam or paper, and then start up the deep fryer.  The reserve brain power we had left was enough to absently plop soft tortillas into our cauldron of scalding oil and watch them emerge as hot, honey-golden crisps.  After a quick sprinkle of salt, they offered the perfect salty crunch to kick started our fading minds.  But we weren’t finished yet.  We wanted something to go with it… Chips + dips=bliss. (Unfortunately, I saw none of these equations on my finals)

The fridge revealed a Mexican powerhouse trio: jalapeno, lime and cilantro.  Initially, we had planned on having guacamole and salsa on separate nights.  But with the copious chip count, we wanted both.  We upped the ante, added hummus to the dip list, and made all three for dinner.  Each incorporated the three fresh ingredients, but had a uniquely defined character.  Arranged elegantly on a long plate, we treated ourselves to velvety guacamole, vibrant salsa, and creamy hummus.  Served cold, it was the kind of meal you could enjoy when it’s too hot for anything heavy.   Although we had it as a dinner, it would also be an excellent appetizer before a meal of grilled chicken or flank steak. 

Guacamole 

Ingredients:

2 avocados, mashed

1 lime, juiced

¾ cup cilantro, finely diced 

½ small onion, diced

1 tomato, seeded and diced

1 jalapeño, seeded and diced

1 tsp salt (to taste)

¼ tsp cumin

Instructions:

1.       Mash avocados into a paste. 

2.       Mix in the rest of the ingredients, and chill.  Place plastic wrap over the guacamole (even when in a sealed container) to preserve freshness and color.

Makes about 2 cups. 

Fresh Salsa

Ingredients:

1 (14.5 oz) can organic tomatoes, diced

1 large tomato, seeded and diced

½ red onion, finely diced

½ cup corn, frozen but brought to room temperature

1 (14.5 oz) can black beans

½ cup cilantro, finely chopped

1 clove garlic, finely minced

1 jalapeno, seeded and diced

Salt and pepper to taste

Instructions:

1.       Mix together all ingredients.  Serve chilled. 

Makes about 4 cups.

Cilantro Jalapeno Hummus

Ingredients:

1 (14.5 oz) can garbanzo beans, reserve drained liquid

1 T tahini

1 clove garlic, finely minced

1 jalapeno, seeded and finely minced

½ cup cilantro, chopped

Lime juice

Cumin

Salt

Instructions:

1.       Remove as many skins from beans as possible. 

2.       Place beans into food processor or blender.  Blend, adding reserve bean liquid when needed.   Should come out looking like a thick, beige paste. 

3.       Add tahini, garlic, jalapeno, and cilantro to blender. 

4.       Season with lime juice, cumin, and salt.

Raw vs. Roast: Oysters and Bone Marrow

They told me oysters were an aphrodisiac.  I would describe as more like a sloppy, seawater kiss.  My first oysters tasted like how I imagine slimy, frog tongues taste.  These grey, ghost-like forms floated on top of puddles of briny ‘oyster liquor’.  Once I slurped the nectar from the shell, I was instructed to gulp down the rest of it whole.  Slowly, it slithered down - that cold, fat, amorphous glob.  The second one was given a quick chew.  I found its texture to be like rubbery flesh and the aftertaste to be straight salt-water.  It’s not that I had a “bad oyster” (admittedly it was a pestering thought on my mind – I have heard the stories!), I just like being able to chew what I eat, and not feel repulsed by what goes down.  Why I still appreciate the oyster is because it stemmed from the challenge to prepare food that had not been tried before.  For me, the reward of these oysters was not the taste, but rather the excitement leading up to the completion of a dare. 

 Shucking oysters would seem to be a job reserved for only hardened seafarers, the Brawny Man, or Chuck Norris.   But a sharp finesse and a good angle can take you a long way.  I remained constantly haunted by the image of slicing through the web of my fingers.  I needed step-by-step instructions, and hands on, guided assistance. That is why I provide you with this link to hopefully help: http://www.marylandinfo.com/sponsorships/how_to_shuck_oysters.html.  

I gingerly placed a teaspoon of mignonette into the oyster shells, open like bodies waiting for autopsy. The mignonette, made of diced shallots, red wine vinegar, fresh parsley, and black pepper, was my lifesaver while eating these.  I enjoyed that more than chasing with a shot of Belvedere vodka. 

So while the oysters were a bit too much to swallow, I am considering keeping meat-butter on hand.  What’s meat-butter, you say?  Sold in stores as bone marrow, we dubbed it meat-butter.  Spreadable, creamy, and extremely dense, it satisfies like an entree and only costs you $2 a pound.  Seldom have I felt a stronger urge from my inner carnivore.  The taste is unforgettable, perhaps because its consumption seems so sinfully taboo.  The marrow itself is chalk full of vitamins and minerals, so there is a reason it is treasured by your natural heart.  Roasting the bones is simple and takes less than a half hour.  In a 450˚F oven, roast the bones for 15-20 minutes.  Fat will leak out of the bottom, so make sure you have a pan that can capture the fatty goodness.  When the marrow starts to bubble slightly, it is ready to be eaten.  Larger bones will take longer.   

 The only negative is that bone marrow is not highly photogenic.  Granted, we did eat the marrow pretty rare.  The pasty-pink color in the photo doesn’t capture the true golden shimmering of the rose colored marrow.  It can have a globby texture but, I appreciated its delicacy.  Toasted slices of French bread served as the base, and the marrow was placed on top of a bed of crunchy, citrus parsley salad.  It was as light as an appetizer, but hefty enough to satisfy your protein craving.  It’s definitely not something you will see at the cafeteria, and I would be surprised to see it on even a high-class restaurant’s menu.  But making it is a) novel for the guest and b) cheap for the host.  Some groceries do carry it, just call ahead and ask.

Bombay Burgers

Re-gifting.  Some people try to justify it by calling it charity or recycling.   C’mon, let’s be honest.  Re-gifting is when your inner-thrifty-shifty self gives a gift that is actually just something from the dregs of your closet or attic.  In the context of thrift stores, this is awesome.  But it’s worth it.  Someone has already paid all the overhead charges, and you buy the product simply for what it’s worth.  I don’t expect to get re-gifted by my grocery store.  Curry powder is your local grocer’s re-gifting scheme.   

 Curry is not an individual spice.  It’s a more generic term for a blend of spices, most often a combination of turmeric, coriander, and cumin.  I am not too distraught about it though – the burgers ended up delicious.  Hopefully, the curry powder creation was intended to make things easier (of course, at a price). 

Now for the real kicker: the Bombay Burger is entirely meatless.  Before your arteries unclog and your “vegetarian alert” comes on, let me tell you – a “burger” made from kidney beans, bread crumbs, sauces and spices still packs a hefty taste.   Initially, the burger has a savory Indian spiciness.  Halfway through, you realize that every bite requires its own exclusive spot in your stomach.  If you eat a ½ pound Bombay Burger, you will feel like you ate a solid ½ pound of food.  The aftertaste left my tongue blanketed with curry.  If only the heavy pounding of a tablespoon of cumin had not left such an unpleasant spiciness…  Bottom line: less cumin, and do not eat or serve the burger entirely plain. 

  My meager toppings the first burger were only a fresh slice of tomato and some sliced onions.  A cream-based sauce was what was missing.  Originally, I had thought some tzatziki sauce would do the trick.  I have not yet had the opportunity to experiment with that one, but I did create a Tomato Dill Sauce to go with my leftovers (rough recipe below).  

 NOM! With the sauce, the burger was bangin’.  You tasted peppery spiciness, without having it knock out your taste buds.  On my second Bombay Burger go-round, I found the burger to be warm and ‘meaty’, and the chilled sauce and fresh tomatoes to be light and relieving.  Appropriate year-round, these ethnic burgers show off how filling and satisfying non-meat burgers can be.   

Bombay Burgers (Adapted from the blog: Voracious)

1 (15 oz) can kidney beans, drained

2 T olive oil

¼ cup water

3 T A1 Steak Sauce

2 T soy sauce

2 tsp cumin

1 T curry

1 clove garlic, minced

1 tsp black pepper

1 tsp paprika

½ tsp Cayenne pepper

2 tsp Sriracha (or Asian Hot Sauce)

½ cup bread crumbs

(About) ½ cup all-purpose flour

3 tsp cornmeal

Instructions:

1.       In a food processor or blender, combine beans, olive oil and water.  Blend until beans are well mashed and smooth.  Scoop into large mixing bowl.

2.       Add steak sauce, soy sauce, cumin, curry, garlic, and black pepper.  Mix thoroughly. 

3.       Season with paprika, cayenne and sriracha (this is where you can make it more or less spicy).

4.       Add in bread crumbs and ¼ cup flour, mix.  (If you need more flour, add it). 

5.       Knead with your hands for about 3-5 minutes.

6.       Roll burgers in cornmeal to help from sticking to hands.  Form bean mixture into 4 patties.

7.       In a 9 inch skillet, heat about 2 T olive oil over medium high heat.  

8.       When oil is hot, place patties on skillet.  Cook for about 7 minutes, or until the outside is firm and compact.  

Serve with a Creamy Sauce, no bun needed.                                                              Makes 4 patties

Tomato Dill Sauce

Ingredients:

2 heaping T sour cream

2 tsp lemon juice

1 tsp dried dill weed

Salt and pepper to taste

Instructions:

1.       Combine all ingredients and serve chilled over burger. 

Makes enough for about one burger.

Pork Stew with Fennel and Butternut Squash

Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow?  When cooking, fresh is best in my book.  Thus, I am wary of recipes that “can be made a day ahead”.  If I want it tomorrow, I made it tomorrow.  Stew happens to be an exception to this rule.  I believe that stews, like beer, are not made but brewed.   They require hours on the stove over a low, consistent heat.  Those involved in the academic world might relate to stews because of our shared interest in mulling.  For me, studying requires an insistent, yet not exhaustive effort.   I need to steadily pour over material before I understand it.  It’s not a “heat-and-eat” method.   So as I considered and chewed on my upcoming work this week, a stew empathetically mulled along with me.  Ah stew, a perfect study buddy (that you can devour at the end). 

Chide me if you will that stews are out of season; but the season of spring is arguably still not upon us. So, haters gonna hate, but this hearty meal will last for days, and will sufficiently fill and satisfy even the most insatiably hungry dinner accomplice. 

After hours of cycling between the oven and the stovetop, I had a stew that literally fell apart, in a good way.  Like a pioneer woman, I hauled a cauldron-looking cast iron pot from the depths of dark oven.  I lifted the top, revealing the savory sustenance within.  The pork shoulder took on an almost beefy flavor, so tender it called for only the most delicate chewing.  The autumn-colored butternut squash provided tasty filler, and the fennel gave the necessary crunch of texture.  Scents of dry, aged red wine and tomatoes filled my lungs with culinary gusto and warmth.  I let the stew cool and thicken on the stove, then put it in the fridge overnight.  The next evening, I slowly reheated it and served it all over egg noodles to make the stew go further.  I devoured spoonful after spoonful.  The flavors had time to further mingle together, creating a stew sauce with the perfect balance.  Starved for a good meal after a weekend of studying, I burnt the roof of my mouth at least three times while eating it – totally worth it.  

It tasted just like “home”.  Not necessarily of any home in particular, just that embrace of familiarity and smile of satisfaction you get when you feel “at home”.  It’s the closest thing to a hug from your dinner that you can get.   

Recipe adapted from Bon Appetit 2004.

Pork Stew with Fennel and Butternut Squash

Ingredients:

3 lbs pork shoulder (Boston Butt), cut into 2 inch pieces

2 tsp salt

1 tsp ground black pepper

1 tsp dry rubbed sage

1 tsp cayenne pepper

¼ tsp nutmeg

½ tsp ground ginger

3 T olive oil

2 cups onions, chopped

3 garlic cloves, minced

1 can (28 oz) diced tomatoes in juice

2 cups low-salt chicken broth

1 cup dry red wine

1 large fennel bulb; fronds chopped and reserved for garnish, bulbs cut into 1-inch cubes

1 small butternut squash, cut into 1 ½ inch cubes

Instructions:

1.       Place pork in large mixing bowl.  Mix next 6 ingredients in small bowl, then sprinkle over pork (make sure it coats it evenly).  Let stand at least 30 minutes. 

2.       Preheat oven to 350˚.

3.       Heat oil in large cast-iron or oven-proof pot over medium-high heat.

4.       Add half of the pork to pot; sauté until brown, about 8 minutes.

5.       Remove browned pork, place on plate or bowl.  Repeat steps 4 & 5 with remaining pork. 

6.       Add onions and garlic to pot; sauté until soft, about 5 minutes. 

7.       Add tomatoes with juices, broth, wine and pork mixture.  Bring to boil and scrape up any browned bits.  Return pork to the pot.

8.       Cover pot, place in oven.  Cook stew 1 hour.

9.       Add fennel bulbs and squash cubes to stew.  Cover and cook in oven until pork and vegetables are tender, about 1 hour.

10.   Using slotted spoon, transfer meat and vegetables to large bowl; cover.

11.   Boil sauce over medium-high heat until thickened enough to coat spoon, about 15-20 minutes.

12.   Return meat and vegetables to sauce; season with salt and pepper. 

(Can be made 1 day ahead.  Cool for 30 minutes.  Refrigerate until ready to use.  Rewarm over low heat.)

A Rockin’ Moroccan Couscous

Couscous has become all the rage in my kitchen.  Why?  For starters, once those tiny, spherical pellets hit boiling water, it’s only a 5 minute countdown ‘til finish.  Made from the same semolina flour used to make spaghetti, couscous is an excellent source of fiber and vitamins.  Nutrition and cook time aside, I love couscous because it is malleable to my mealtime musings.  A dish laden with ethnic spices and cooked vegetables, the quintessential Moroccan-style couscous, is as easy as the Greek Salad couscous with fresh tomatoes, Kalamata olives, cucumber, and feta cheese.  I even eat them “barebones”, with a little help from my friends: olive oil, salt, and pepper.   It’s simply a matter of your mood and what you have in your pantry.   

Feeling that I had been under utilizing my spice arsenal recently, I opted for Moroccan Couscous.  While you may view the amount of spices as daunting, it is multi-purpose.  While cooking, I discovered a novel method of air freshening: toasting spices.  Cook and clean at the same time.  That is consummate college cooking.  After only a few seconds, the stale kitchen air was shrouded with a veil of aromatic spices. 

Though I went meatless on this version of Moroccan Couscous, you will not leave the table hungry.  Garbanzo beans, or chickpeas, are the muscle-building protein for this meal.  Beans get a bad rap for being a “poor man’s meat”.  But at $1 a can, the “poor college student” sees opportunity.  Chick peas have been cultivated for over 7,500 years.  Their track record among humans is solid.  Plus, they have a great nutty taste, are low-fat and high protein.  Why give up on a good thing?  

Your first bite brings on this epiphany that what you are eating is the perfect blend of fragrant herbs and spices, couscous, chickpeas, vegetables, raisins, and orange juice all at once.  Then you realize that Moroccan Couscous is a lot easier to say, especially when your mouth is full.  Enjoy the noms!

Moroccan Couscous

Ingredients:

1 tsp ground cumin

½ tsp freshly grated ginger

½ tsp ground cayenne pepper

¼ tsp ground coriander

¼ tsp ground cinnamon

¼ tsp ground allspice

2 T olive oil

1 red onion, finely diced

1 clove garlic, minced

1 red bell pepper, diced

1 zucchini, diced

½ cup raisins

1 tsp kosher salt

1 tsp ground black pepper

1 T grated lemon zest

1 (14.5 oz) can low sodium garbanzo beans, rinsed and drained

1 ½ cups vegetable broth

½ cup orange juice

1 ½ cups couscous

3 T fresh mint, chopped

Instructions:

1.       Heat a large, heavy bottomed pan (I used my 13 inch All-Clad) over medium heat. 

2.       Stir in spices; gently toast until fragrant, about 2-3 minutes.

3.       Stir in oil, onion, and garlic until softened.   

 4.       Stir in bell pepper and zucchini; cook for 5 minutes. 

 5.       Stir in the raisins, salt, black pepper, lemon zest, and garbanzos.

6.       Pour in chicken broth and orange juice; turn heat to high and bring to a boil. 

 7.       When mixture is boiling, stir in the couscous and remove from heat; cover, and let stand 5 minutes. 

8.       Fluff with a fork, and fold in chopped mint.